So, if I am being honest, I considered myself extremely ambitious (my sun is a Capricorn so honestly I can’t help it lol) and I find that extremely attractive in a counterpart.
I am also super traditional hence my spirituality and I think my first ministry is my home. So how can you balance both? Is it even possible?
- Set boundaries. Whether it’s the time you each leave the office, or how often you work from home, make sure you communicate and set clear expectations about how your careers will spill over into your life .I have a rule of no technology from 7 to 8. If I need to reschedule due to booking clients, I will rearrange my no tech time and dinner, to make sure we get that one on one quality time. Ambitious-oriented couples often enjoy working and making money, however setting boundaries allows you to also enjoy one another other.
- Talk about your financial goals and limits early. What is your money story, do you operate from a place of lack or fear? These are all important things to know in a relationship. One thing that I discussed is building generational wealth, what does that mean and how can we achieve it as a unit? Also, what are we saving for? What does our lives look like, the truth is I don’t want to work forever to look forward to retirement, I genuinely want to enjoy life each day and for some of those things’ money is required.
- Plan intentional and uninterrupted time for each other. It’s important to create regular time to spend together. Maybe you make special moments out of running errands or perhaps you exercise every Saturday together. You can also try scheduling a date night for every Friday (or whatever day works best for you) that can’t be rescheduled. The point is to find quality time together to look forward to these small investments helps create healthy longevity over time. People skip over affairs but a lot of them happen at work with coworkers, so I encourage couples to not forget about one another or take their partner for granted.
- Communicate communicate communicate don’t hold things in, life as a ambitious couple can get stressful especially for entrepreneurs. Don’t be afraid to talk about what you need from one another of course in a positive way. I suggest reading my blog post “How to Talk To Your Spouse About Improvement”, for suggestions on how to frame a need in a positive way. The point is don’t let things sit inside of you and blow up about it later. Make room and time in your relationship where it feels safe to communicate.
- Show unconditional support. It can be challenging to show interest in your spouse’s career after your own long day of work. But it’s important that you’re thoughtful and present in your conversations relating to your partner’s career, and that your support is unconditional toward their work. Without such support, a lack of understanding and resentment can fester up in your partner, making it difficult to be on one accord as a unit or team.
- Contrary to popular belief no relationship is always 50/50 especially as an ambitious couple. So, you have to understand at some point sacrifices will have to be made. I want to encourage you all to not make them one sided especially when you are dealing with an understanding partner. Accept and acknowledge the importance of your partner’s sacrifice to further your career and be willing to do the same for their dreams in the future.
- Remember compatibility is not based on a person’s job title. One thing I stated earlier is that I love an ambitious man, so I looked for that trait versus their job title and status. If you have the mindset of, I am going to go out and be the best at whatever or I can make something happen, that’s attractive. However, we know life is uncertain, so your job title shouldn’t be the thing that makes someone stay versus your character. Remember that as you are pursuing your goals as a couple.
- Include one another in making decisions. Yes, I know you are a grown person who is capable of thinking on your own, but a team moves together not separately. So include each other, I promise it will work out in your favor more times than not.
- Assign clear roles and decide who takes out the trash, who does the dishes, who cooks, and who vacuums. Stick to it, but then don’t be afraid to break out the dish soap when your partner is having a tough week for balance and appreciation purposes.
- Pour into each other. You all would be amazed how so many people in relationships don’t think about that person in their day to day, especially when you are caught up in pursuing your ambitious career goals…. however this is a recipe for disaster. So do small things often like make their coffee, write them love notes in their lunch, kiss them, rub their feet, back or scalp, run a bath, whatever you can do to make them feel loved and desired, it is vital to the health of your relationship as a couple.
I pray these 10 items were helpful and if you are looking to get in alignment with your purpose mate, please feel free to reach out to me directly and let’s see how I can help. I look forward to serving you.
Your Sista on the Sofa,